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There seems to be a perception amongst some people that I haven’t been writing lately.
I understand this perception. I assume it’s because I haven’t been writing lately.
You can blame my wife. (Or, you can thank her – it’s all in your perspective.) She pointed out a fact to me some months ago that had been painfully – painfully – obvious to me: “You’re writing the same message over and over.”
She was right. I was writing the same message over and over.
And over and over.
And over again.
Needlessly repeating myself again and again.
And again and again.
I have spent a lot of time trying to write. I would stare at the computer screen, the cursor blinking at me. Taunting me. Daring me. I felt like Billy Crystal in Throw Momma From the Train, unable to type anything beyond “The night was…”
Even now, as I’m writing about the writer’s block (boulder is more like it) I’ve been staring at for such a long time, I find myself riddled with self doubt about writing this piece.
Sitting down to write started feeling like waiting at a railroad crossing. Usually I could see my train of thought in the distance, but it never seemed to make any progress. On occasion, the train would come speeding across and be gone before I could get a good look at it.
After much prayerful consideration and reflection, I realize the problem isn’t the train. The problem is the crossing arms – or, rather, my sitting at the crossing arms. I can’t drive through the barrier. It’s illegal and extremely dangerous to try driving between the lowered arms at a railroad crossing.
However, I can circumvent the impasse by turning around and finding another crossing.
Which is what I’m doing.
I’m driving the same vehicle (writing). And I need to cross the same set of tracks (my train of thought). I just need to find a somewhat different road from which to cross – a different approach to writing. A style that is more aligned to me – to who God Himself created me to be. More personal. More humorous.
My goal is ultimately the same: help people through depression and anxiety through faith in Jesus Christ. I can show you Scriptures all day long about peace and joy and fear and worry and quote Matthew 6:33 until I’m blue in the face. But I need to demonstrate more faith and joy. I need to widen the aperture a bit to let out more light.
It’s one thing to write about it. It’s quite another to write with it.
I have a very nebulous idea of how my writing is going to look. It will be more humorous in approach. It may even be irreverent (gasp!) than some may like. But maybe a little irreverence is what some of us need.
Maybe we need to lighten up and quit taking everything so serious.
Please stick with me as I seek my voice in writing. Input is more than welcome – it is encouraged. PM me or e-mail me (firstname.lastname@example.org) or message me via carrier pigeon (although you may want to wait until the spring thaw – send a bird up here now and he’ll end up more freezer burnt than that bag of baby peas buried in the bottom of my freezer).
I have to go. Got a train to catch!