The fear of man brings a snare,
But whoever trusts in the Lord shall be safe.

– Proverbs 25:29 (NKJV)¹

If he had a name, we never knew it.

How he got down there, we’ll never know.

My brother and I never saw him, but we knew he was there. We heard him through the vents. We saw what appeared to be claw marks in the wood stairs. We even smelled the faint aroma of must and decaying banana peels wafting up from the beneath the floorboards.

He was there alright. Lurking. Waiting. Scheming. Planning for the day one of us would wrangle up the courage to dare go downstairs.

We had a monkey living – thriving – in the dark, dank basement of our childhood home. He lived on bananas and the flesh of small children. This is why, when I was five, my parents had to sell the old house. I’m sure Mom or Dad went downstairs to grab a can of green beans only to hear the monkey’s raspy whisper: “Get out of the house.”

That monkey is the reason I could never read the Curious George books. It’s why, as a teenager, I would shudder with a cold spinal shiver every time “Shock the Monkey” came on the radio. To this day, I can’t go in the primate house at Como Zoo without great trepidation.

Poltergeist had nothing on this terrorizing, child eating primate.

In our minds, he was real.

As I grew up, that dread of fear never really left me. We moved away from the monkey, but the monkey never moved away from me. I was afraid of everything. I remember when I was about eight – three years after we moved into our new, basementless house – feeling extremely anxious one night because I had inadvertently brought home a library book.

A reference library book.

You know, from the school library shelves of books that should never, ever leave the library, on pain of whacks.

I had broken the rules. Yes, I signed my name to the card inside the front cover and put it on the librarian’s desk. But I was sure that would not prove my good intentions to return the book on time and in the same shape I found it. Instead, it would serve as my signed confession of guilt. My death warrant. Death by paddle. A big, twenty-pound wooden paddle, with holes drilled in it to deliver the pain with stealth aerodynamics and grooves in the handle to provide extra grip for the school executioner. I was sure the last sound I would ever hear would be the whistle of the wind blowing through the holes in that oak instrument of torture as it sped toward my backside.

The next morning I went straight to the school library and, after carefully wiping down the book to remove any fingerprints, placed it on the return cart.

Not a word was ever said. The summons to the principal’s office never came.

The crack and sting of the paddle was not for my bottom to bear.

As an adult, the monkey continued to harass me. I feared so much in life. Eventually the monkey wore me down. There was no sense in trying anything. Every failure served only to prove the monkey was stronger than me.

Fear had a stranglehold on my life. It felt like everything I tried ended in failure. I tried so hard to overcome my anxieties. Yet I lived in fear of failure, fear of people (authority figures, folks I thought were above my station, you name it)…

Much later in life, I began to realize the depth of faith in God. I started to figure out that these awful things I felt, thought, believed about myself and my life were wrong. They were rooted in lies. They were founded on trying to do everything myself (after all, I had to prove my worth to everyone).

Here is the truth I’m finally getting into my thick skull: God is sovereign. Good is faithful. God is good. God is love. I can – must – trust God, no matter the circumstances. My knowledge is limited. God is omniscient. My strength wains. God is omnipotent. I spread myself too thin too often, trying to take on so much to prove my worth to myself and others (and even God!). God is omnipresent.

The only fear we ought to have is the fear – the reverential, awe-filled respect and recognition – of God, revealed to us through Jesus Christ and His Word. If I fear anything – or anyone – else, I’m telling the all-mighty God of the Universe, the Creator and Sustainer of All, that I don’t trust Him with my life. That He is incapable of taking care of me. That His Way is trumped by my own thoughts and feelings.

How arrogant of me.

It;s a matter of trust. Will I trust the lies of fear, rooted in untruth, unreal and inaccurate thoughts and feelings? Or will I trust the Lord, the Author of Truth? Today, I choose God. I repent of ever allowing that monkey to dig his claws into my back. I strive to seek the Lord above all things.

Do I fail? Every day.

Do I keep going back to Jesus? Every day.

Does He renew things in my life and continue to strengthen and guide me – even when the monkey comes back for a visit?

Every day.

I’ve stopped buying the Monkey Chow. You should, too.

Read the below Psalm. Then read it again. Let the words sink into your soul.

¹ I will bless the Lord at all times;
His praise shall continually be in my mouth.
² My soul shall make its boast in the Lord;
The humble shall hear of it and be glad.
³ Oh, magnify the Lord with me,
And let us exalt His name together.

⁴ I sought the Lord, and He heard me,
And delivered me from all my fears.
⁵ They looked to Him and were radiant,
And their faces were not ashamed.
⁶ This poor man cried out, and the Lord heard him,
And saved him out of all his troubles.
⁷ The angel of the Lord encamps all around those who fear Him,
And delivers them.

⁸ Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good;
Blessed is the man who trusts in Him!
⁹ Oh, fear the Lord, you His saints!
There is no want to those who fear Him.
¹⁰ The young lions lack and suffer hunger;
But those who seek the Lord shall not lack any good thing.

¹¹ Come, you children, listen to me;
I will teach you the fear of the Lord.
¹² Who is the man who desires life,
And loves many days, that he may see good?
¹³ Keep your tongue from evil,
And your lips from speaking deceit.
¹⁴ Depart from evil and do good;
Seek peace and pursue it.

¹⁵ The eyes of the Lord are on the righteous,
And His ears are open to their cry.
¹⁶ The face of the Lord is against those who do evil,
To ^[c]cut off the remembrance of them from the earth.

¹⁷ The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears,
And delivers them out of all their troubles.
¹⁸ The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart,
And saves such as have a contrite spirit.

¹⁹ Many are the afflictions of the righteous,
But the Lord delivers him out of them all.
²⁰ He guards all his bones;
Not one of them is broken.
²¹ Evil shall slay the wicked,
And those who hate the righteous shall be condemned.
²² The Lord redeems the soul of His servants,
And none of those who trust in Him shall be condemned.

• Psalm 34 (NKJV)

1. Scriptures in this post taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved. ↩︎
2. The picture of monkeys is actually a painting by Gabriel von Max: Affen als Kunstkritiker, 1889 Öl auf Leinwand, 85 x 107 cm – Neue Pinakothek, München {{Category:Gabriel von Max}} {{PD-art}} First uploaded to de.wikipedia 9 May 2005 by de:Benutzer:Luestling. Category:Primates in art ↩︎

The gospels give us two different accounts of Jesus on the Sea of Galilee. In the first (Matthew 8:23-27), the disciples are in the boat with Jesus when a raging storm comes up, threatening their lives. As the disciples are panicking, Jesus is in the back of the boat, sound asleep. When they wake Jesus, He gently rebukes them (“O ye of little faith”), then commands the storm to stop.

Which it did.

Immediately.

In the second (Matthew 14:22-33), Jesus sends the twelve out on the sea without Him. Again, the winds blow up, threatening to capsize the boat with the disciples aboard. Out on the choppy swells they sea what they think is a ghost. The “apparition” is no apparition at all.

It’s Jesus.

But when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were terrified, and said, “It is a ghost!” and they cried out in fear. But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, “Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid.”

And Peter answered him, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” He said, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me.” Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased. 

Matthew 14:26-32 (ESV)

Notice a few things:

1. In both instances Jesus was in the storm with the disciples.
2. In both instances Jesus recued the disciples.
3. In the first instance, Jesus led them into the storm, and stopped the storm immediately.
4. In the second instance, Jesus bid Peter to walk through the storm. Peter was fine as long as he kept his gaze on the Lord. But, when he took his eyes off Jesus, Peter began to drown. When he cried out “Lord, save me!” Jesus did just that. Immediately.
5. In the first instance, Jesus spoke to the disciples, saying “O you of little faith”. When He rescued Peter, Jesus repeated the phrase to him. And then, just as before, He calmed the storm. This should have served as a reminder to Peter about the first storm Jesus saw them through – emboldening their faith even more.

There is a lot to glean from these two passages in Matthew. But the point I’m making here is the simple / obvious one: we’re going to have troubles in our life. Circumstances are sometimes going to be ugly. Even when you’re far away from the relative safety of the shore, the LORD is in the boat with you. The wind and waves are under His control. Whether He stops the storm immediately or calls us to walk through it, He is there.

There is no reason to fear any storm in life. The LORD is in the boat with us. Focus on Jesus, not the troubles. Stay the course with God and know it’s all OK. It doesn’t matter how your bad your situation may seem, it’s all in God’s hands. Rest in that knowledge. Praise God for Who He is. And keep your eyes on God.

If you’ve been reading my articles and short devotionals over the years, you probably know my favorite place to go when I’m facing anxiety and worry is Philippians 4.

A great tool to use when studying Scripture is to look at the key words in the passage. Let’s look at Philippians 4:4-9 [NIV] and focus on the key words in this passage. My prayer is that this blesses us, and helps us get rid of the dreadful worries and fears that plague us, and put our minds on track where they should be: faithfully praising God through our storms, firmly rooted in Jesus Christ and remembering the LORD is sovereign over all – even the things that cause us anxiety and worry.

⁴ Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. – When are we to rejoice in the Lord? Always! Not “always unless…” Not once we feel like it. Not when circumstances improve. When we rejoice in the LORD, we put our focus on Him, not our problems. We recognize He is in control, not us. We realize He has everything in His hands. Would the apostle Paul instruct us to rejoice always – even repeating the point to emphasize it – if there was a reason to worry instead?

⁵ Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; – I love that word “reasonableness”. Other versions of the Bible translate the Greek term as “gentleness”. I believe the message here is this: don’t freak out. Be calm in the storm. Think of Jesus on the boat with the disciples as this massive storm rages around them (Matthew 8:23-27). The twelve are in a panic, sure they’re going to drown. Jesus is in the back of the boat, sleeping peacefully. When they awaken Jesus in their fright, He says, “O ye of little faith…” And calms the storm. When Jesus got in the boat with the disciples, do you suppose He knew the storm would take place? He led them right into it! Sometimes He does the same with us. Never ever will you face a situation where God looks at it and says, “Hmm… I didn’t see that coming.” When facing a storm, we need to go to the LORD first – in faith – and let others see our faith in God. No matter what’s going on, God is with you. Just like Jesus was in the boat with the twelve.

⁶ do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. – What should we fear? What is there to be anxious about? Nothing. We are to not worry about anything. Instead we are to take everything to God in prayer, trusting Him, knowing He is in the boat with us. And – a huge key to this – go to Him with thanksgiving. We can do that when we surrender our lives to the LORD, knowing deep down there is nothing too hard for Him, that He loves us with a depth we cannot measure. We go where God leads us, but we don’t always know where God leads us. Or why. But we must trust that He has a purpose for us – to grow us, strengthen us, help us. This is not merely for our own sake, but for those He places in our lives as well. Once we let go of the worries and fears over our situations, and trust that God is in control, we can experience God’s peace. We don’t need to figure it out. It’s “beyond understanding”. It may make no earthly sense to be at peace with the struggles we’re facing. But that’s why it’s God’s peace He’s giving us. It is based on our sure hope in the Lord’s goodness, grace, mercy and love. As Jesus was preparing His disciples for His coming crucifixion, He said to them, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid” (John 14:27, ESV).

⁸ Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. ⁹ What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you. – We need to focus our thoughts on the things of God, on His Word, on His promises. Not on our problems. Not on our worries. But on our Heavenly Father, on Jesus Christ, on the Holy Spirit. Jesus modeled grace under extreme pressure for us. And the Bible repeatedly tells us not to be anxious.

I hope this has blessed you deeply. If I can pray for you, please let me know. And if would please continue praying for me, I would appreciate it. It isn’t easy to let go of anxiety and give it all to God. But we have to learn to let our faith grow through our trials. :In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world” (John 16:33b, ESV).

The struggle with anxiety and depression has been a real battle lately. Stress triggers, life changes, life issues, life in general, all can work to drag a person down in the mire of negativity and worry and burn out. I share this not to elicit sympathy, but to inspire hope. Hope is there for all of us.

Let mem share some truth with you. Ready?

(Jesus said:) “²⁸ Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. ²⁹ Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰ For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

– Matthew 11:28-30 (ESV)

All who labor and are heavy burdened are those of us who are worried or stressed, weighed down by the troubles of life.

Those who are hurting.

Those who mourn.

Those who are confused.

Those who are at a loss about where to turn.

Those who are at the end of their tether.

Those facing a broken relationship.

Those who hunger for something more.

Those who feel abandoned, rejected, unwanted, unneeded, unloved…

Those who have a need they cannot seem to fill.

Those who feel helpless.

Those who worry about tomorrow.

Those who can’t get out of bed to face today.

Those who constantly relive the shame or guilt or pain of yesterday.

Those who feel alone.

Those who feel hopeless.

Please know this: you are not hopeless. You are not beyond help. You have Jesus.

Yes, you’ve heard it before. But where is God when we cry out? Where is He in the silence? Where is He when we hurt and ache and cannot sense His presence?

He is right here. He is with you. And when we’re in the midst of the fog of depression, it’s even harder to hear from Him. The key, I believe, is simple. Not necessarily easy, but simple.

It’s about letting go. It’s about trusting God and taking Jesus at His Word. It’s about going to the LORD in faith and crying out, letting go of the hurt and the fear and the anxious troubles and the despair and hardship. It’s about choosing to believe what we cannot necessarily see with our own eyes.

Theer comes a point where we have to simply admit we cannot carry this burden any longer. We need to seek the LORD, trust Him with every aspect of our lives, and wait for Him.

No, it isn’t easy. We’re often tempted with the worrying thoughts and wearying sadness that comes from our troubles and hardships and sorrows. Instead of latching on to the troubling notions that plague our untrustworthy emotions, remember what Paul said:

³⁵ Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? ³⁶ As it is written,

“For your sake we are being killed all the day long;
    we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.”

³⁷ No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. ³⁸ For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, ³⁹ nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

– Romans 8:35-39 (ESV)

Despite what our emotionds may be telling us, the LORD is with us always. Don’t give up. Don’t lose heart. Don’t flame out. Trust God. And when you feel you can’t hang on much longer, cry out to Jesus and trust Him. And just keep trusting Him – despite how circumstances may appear. God has you. He knows us better than we know ourselves. Trust Him.

 ⁶ But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” ⁷ Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. ⁸ Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

– James 4:6-8 (ESV)

Trying to rule the world around me is hard. I’m tired of kicking myself when I miss the mark. I’m worn out with struggling when life around me is not going the way I expect. I’m exhausted by striving for results that continue to elude me.

It occurs to me that, perhaps – just perhaps – what’s made me so tired isn’t the circumstances I face, but the over-sized gargantuan ego I drag around with me. As a perfectionist control freak who absolutely has to call the shots in every area of life, the leap of recognition that all these thoughts are rooted in a swollen ego is a bitter pill to swallow.

But swallow the pill I must.

As a child, I hated taking pills. I mean gag-me-with-a-children’s-aspirin dislike for pills. Thankfully, my grandmother had the answer: grape jelly. A pill hidden in a spoonful of grape jelly was much easier to take. Far less gagging, far more cooperation from 8-year-old me. (By the way, I’m sure any flavor of jelly will work. In the mid 1970’s, I didn’t realize jelly was made from any other fruit. And orange marmalade was definitely no substitute!)

As an adult, I no longer use the grape jelly method of pill swallowing.

But I wish I did.

I could excuse all my attempted sovereignty by saying I have “trust issues”. After all, who knows me better than me? Who knows what’s best for me better than me? Looking back at my life, I can truly the say the answer to these questions is not “me”. Indeed, every good thing to happen to me – every time something bad was made good – I was not the one responsible for the results.

It’s always been God.

And yet, I still struggle with double-minded doubts and try to take back control of issues I’ve already “given” to the LORD. Who am I to ever think He’s too slow to move, too busy to care, etc.?

The simple truth is this:

⁶ “Seek the Lord while he may be found;
    call upon him while he is near;
⁷ let the wicked forsake his way,
    and the unrighteous man his thoughts;
let him return to the Lord, that he may have compassion on him,
    and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.
⁸ For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
⁹ For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.

– Isaiah 55:6-9 (ESV) (bold typeface added for emphasis)

Refusing to let God be sovereign is a problem. For one, wow… who am I to every think God could be anything less than absolutely sovereign over all? Who am I to question His decisions, His timing, His ways? Who am I to think everything in life needs to make sense to my limited cognitive capacity? Who am I to feel everything has to go my way?

It’s time to stop gagging and take my medicine. It’s time to just surrender. It’s time to see the LORD for Who He is and who i am.

It’s time to abdicate my phony “throne” and accept that God is in control, not me. It’s time to rest in His goodness, love and grace and drop this sin of self-centered egotism. The LORD wants me to give up all control to Him. He doesn’t even want me to be an advisor.

Man… this whole surrendering thing is tough! But I have no real control anyway. And God’s ways are infinitely better than mine.

I need to surrender to Jesus in all areas of my life and rest my ego. That’s the only way to bring down the swelling.